And so I should go to sleep, the night being old, and the long stories being medium maximum, instead of short.
But with cake in my mouth, and coconut water by my side, all I can think of is . . .
Times goes by.
That boring theme, that boring refrain.
So I'll switch instead. To say that I am a big sap. I went to a fundraiser tonight and heard Indra Nooyi speak. She was good but not great but I appreciated her a lot for her goodness. And then Cory Booker spoke and he was great and great.
And I realized that I care oh yes I care.
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Monday, November 15, 2010
Further thoughts
Quixotic scolds for not making clear the multitude/ India/ narrative point in my earlier post. Which was just that Rushdie's novels, such as Midnight's Children, are about India, and they are dense and full of competing, different stories (all strung together in a madcap way), and it was great to see his theory of fiction, which is that narratives about India should be crowded and squeezed together, in a second class train compartment.
Clear now?
I'm listening to sleepy music. The purpose of which is to put me to sleep. But it's making me contemplative. Which is bad. I'm over contemplation. Which is why I want to work out like a fiend so that I sleep sleep sleep as soon as I settle down into my bed.
Yes, I'm shallow like that.
Which reminds me of the lyrics, "You were always crazy like that" from Foolish Games by Jewel. Which I don't listen to very often, actually, but which is a song that plagues Antoine's mind from time to time. This makes for interesting chat conversations.
Ant: You stood in the rain . . . etc.
Me: [Insert mad cap story.]
Ant: You were always crazy like that.
Clear now?
I'm listening to sleepy music. The purpose of which is to put me to sleep. But it's making me contemplative. Which is bad. I'm over contemplation. Which is why I want to work out like a fiend so that I sleep sleep sleep as soon as I settle down into my bed.
Yes, I'm shallow like that.
Which reminds me of the lyrics, "You were always crazy like that" from Foolish Games by Jewel. Which I don't listen to very often, actually, but which is a song that plagues Antoine's mind from time to time. This makes for interesting chat conversations.
Ant: You stood in the rain . . . etc.
Me: [Insert mad cap story.]
Ant: You were always crazy like that.
Sunday, November 14, 2010
The usual update
Far be it from me to let an entire month go by without blogging. Thus this late-night-Sunday entry when I'm already taking stock of my life, the week past, the week ahead, now translated onto blog format for your viewing and reading pleasure.
What has happened since October 20, the date of the last post? So much and so little. In many ways, I have a rhythm to my life, a routine and a regularity of things that I do. Which makes life simple, really. Days fly by.
But also so much. I went to South Africa! Yes, that was unusual, a break from the routine. Although everything is a repetition in some variation of things that have passed. Like not having electricity in the Pretoria guest house when trying to prepare for my presentation -- just like living in Sierra Leone all over again!
I don't feel like recapping the goings on. I always feel that I do them injustice. I'm too half-hearted, too hasty. Trying to capture factual details in a hurried way, not delving into them and exploring their nuances. So, instead, thoughts, highlights:
(a) I love visiting friends. Old friends were in town this past weekend, and we did the usual, epic things we do when we get together, like karaoke, eat dinners out, drink beers, sit in front of the TV, lounge, lounge, lounge and talk, talk, talk.
(b) I love traveling but traveling alone can be tedious. I enjoyed South Africa, particularly, walking along the beachfront in Durban. But then every now and then a twinge reminds you that it would be nice to share the experience with family and friends. For which I think technology. Photographs can be shared instantly by blackberry, and text messaging keeps one in touch when afar. Wow, sentimental.
(c) India is full of multitudes. I say this not from recent personal observation although I agree with the observation. Rather, I was reading an interview with Salman Rushdie regarding his upcoming novel, and he said that he wanted to convey a myriad stories in his previous novels, such that the main narrative had to push and force its way through on to the page. I thought that was a great description of a narrative technique.
(d) Cooking is important. The more I cook, the more I like doing it. I want to be the kind of person who can put tasty nourishment on the table at any time. This is important to me. Today, I had a couple of friends over for brunch. The majority left but two guests lingered while I cleaned up. They sat on the couch, drinking coffee, and exchanged news important to the other. I put all the dishes in the dishwasher, I wiped down the table, I put the leftover food in the fridge, I sorted my mail, I stripped the sheets from my bed and the guest bed for washing . . . all the while knowing that two friends were relaxing in my living room, catching up, and that made me happy. I want to provide an environment where people can be comfortable.
(e) I love music. I have heard some recent new music. Again, I'm captivated by certain songs to the typical point (typical for me) of endless repetition. Like this is the only song I can listen to on repeat over and over and over again as I go to the grocery store, as I ride up in my elevator, as I walk to work. I wonder sometimes if this kind of "obsessive" behavior is bad, and whether I should change these habits. But I never will. I don't think.
(f) I hope Christina Yang rejoins the residency program on Grey's Anatomy. Yes, I know it's not to admit that I still watch this show, but I don't care. And I identify most with Christina (even though our lives are completely different, not to mention she's a fictional TV character). And I feel sad that she won't go on to become a famous, successful heart surgeon. As I feel sad (in an abstract way, not entirely meaningful, yet not meaningless) that I won't be a surgeon.
(g) Walking the streets of Paris is wonderful. Yes, I did that, too, on my way back from South Africa to New York. I forget how beautiful Paris is. And how much I love windows. Of apartments into which I can look. It's not glimpses of private lives, really. I don't actually need to see people in the apartments. Rather, I want to see the lights. The bookshelves. The high ceilings.
(h) Point (g) meandered. From Paris and walking to glimpses into apartments. I guess that these are not self-contained points, but rather meandering, rambling points. Which is fine. I hope you agree with me.
(i)I love working out. I take that back. I don't like lifting weights. But I love physical activity and exercise. I dream about an ideal life. Which I should "actualize." It involves being in a tennis league where I am a ferocious player. And a racquetball league. It involves swimming in a clean pool (far from my present New York public pool). It involves running half-marathons (for which I registered recently; let's see if my lottery application gets accepted; the NYC triathlon was full, and my lottery application didn't succeed). I'm not sure why. I certainly wasn't a jock in high school or college. But I just love the idea and feeling of falling asleep exhausted on my bed.
(j) Enough.
What has happened since October 20, the date of the last post? So much and so little. In many ways, I have a rhythm to my life, a routine and a regularity of things that I do. Which makes life simple, really. Days fly by.
But also so much. I went to South Africa! Yes, that was unusual, a break from the routine. Although everything is a repetition in some variation of things that have passed. Like not having electricity in the Pretoria guest house when trying to prepare for my presentation -- just like living in Sierra Leone all over again!
I don't feel like recapping the goings on. I always feel that I do them injustice. I'm too half-hearted, too hasty. Trying to capture factual details in a hurried way, not delving into them and exploring their nuances. So, instead, thoughts, highlights:
(a) I love visiting friends. Old friends were in town this past weekend, and we did the usual, epic things we do when we get together, like karaoke, eat dinners out, drink beers, sit in front of the TV, lounge, lounge, lounge and talk, talk, talk.
(b) I love traveling but traveling alone can be tedious. I enjoyed South Africa, particularly, walking along the beachfront in Durban. But then every now and then a twinge reminds you that it would be nice to share the experience with family and friends. For which I think technology. Photographs can be shared instantly by blackberry, and text messaging keeps one in touch when afar. Wow, sentimental.
(c) India is full of multitudes. I say this not from recent personal observation although I agree with the observation. Rather, I was reading an interview with Salman Rushdie regarding his upcoming novel, and he said that he wanted to convey a myriad stories in his previous novels, such that the main narrative had to push and force its way through on to the page. I thought that was a great description of a narrative technique.
(d) Cooking is important. The more I cook, the more I like doing it. I want to be the kind of person who can put tasty nourishment on the table at any time. This is important to me. Today, I had a couple of friends over for brunch. The majority left but two guests lingered while I cleaned up. They sat on the couch, drinking coffee, and exchanged news important to the other. I put all the dishes in the dishwasher, I wiped down the table, I put the leftover food in the fridge, I sorted my mail, I stripped the sheets from my bed and the guest bed for washing . . . all the while knowing that two friends were relaxing in my living room, catching up, and that made me happy. I want to provide an environment where people can be comfortable.
(e) I love music. I have heard some recent new music. Again, I'm captivated by certain songs to the typical point (typical for me) of endless repetition. Like this is the only song I can listen to on repeat over and over and over again as I go to the grocery store, as I ride up in my elevator, as I walk to work. I wonder sometimes if this kind of "obsessive" behavior is bad, and whether I should change these habits. But I never will. I don't think.
(f) I hope Christina Yang rejoins the residency program on Grey's Anatomy. Yes, I know it's not to admit that I still watch this show, but I don't care. And I identify most with Christina (even though our lives are completely different, not to mention she's a fictional TV character). And I feel sad that she won't go on to become a famous, successful heart surgeon. As I feel sad (in an abstract way, not entirely meaningful, yet not meaningless) that I won't be a surgeon.
(g) Walking the streets of Paris is wonderful. Yes, I did that, too, on my way back from South Africa to New York. I forget how beautiful Paris is. And how much I love windows. Of apartments into which I can look. It's not glimpses of private lives, really. I don't actually need to see people in the apartments. Rather, I want to see the lights. The bookshelves. The high ceilings.
(h) Point (g) meandered. From Paris and walking to glimpses into apartments. I guess that these are not self-contained points, but rather meandering, rambling points. Which is fine. I hope you agree with me.
(i)I love working out. I take that back. I don't like lifting weights. But I love physical activity and exercise. I dream about an ideal life. Which I should "actualize." It involves being in a tennis league where I am a ferocious player. And a racquetball league. It involves swimming in a clean pool (far from my present New York public pool). It involves running half-marathons (for which I registered recently; let's see if my lottery application gets accepted; the NYC triathlon was full, and my lottery application didn't succeed). I'm not sure why. I certainly wasn't a jock in high school or college. But I just love the idea and feeling of falling asleep exhausted on my bed.
(j) Enough.
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Typos
I read over my blog entries after the fact, which means after they have been uploaded, and I often realize that they are laden or strewn (I couldn't decide upon which word to use, so chose both) with errors.
So be it.
Life is too short to fix inconsequential errors.
But are they inconsequential? Is deeming them so just a way to deal with the fact that I just don't care enough anymore to revise myself. (while that might be OK on a blog that no one but my dear reader(s) reads, is that OK in the real world? We must always revise ourselves. Although perhaps I mean reinvent.)
Time flew by tonight. I have had a lot of family stay with me recently. Tonight, suddenly, it was silent night.
But not for long. Loch Sess arrives soon. I await the funk.
So be it.
Life is too short to fix inconsequential errors.
But are they inconsequential? Is deeming them so just a way to deal with the fact that I just don't care enough anymore to revise myself. (while that might be OK on a blog that no one but my dear reader(s) reads, is that OK in the real world? We must always revise ourselves. Although perhaps I mean reinvent.)
Time flew by tonight. I have had a lot of family stay with me recently. Tonight, suddenly, it was silent night.
But not for long. Loch Sess arrives soon. I await the funk.
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Peggy
This post is dedicated to Peggy. Although I'm not entirely sure that she would like what I have to say about her.
I love Peggy. She's bold, ambitious, creative, and tries really, really hard to get what she wants. Which means that she tries too hard sometimes. Which can be her downfall.
(Oh, you're wondering who Peggy is? She's in Mad Men. Watch it.)
It sucks when the problem is that you try too hard. Because what are you supposed to do? Try a little less? Which goes against anything an ambitious person has been told (just give it your very best and forget the rest). How can you sit back and, say, watch things fall apart? Of course, you're going to try and try and try even if it means overwatering your plants so that the leaves turn brown, and roots start to rot, and it's all downhill for peace lily #2).
I like Peggy because she wants to succeed. She has a hunger and a drive. I used to think I had a hunger and a drive. I"m not so sure anymore. I like to think I have a hunger and a drive but that might not be the actuality. I'm mostly lazy.
Peggy goes with the flow. She got pregnant. Of her own volition? Not entirely clear. But she got pregnant. She dealt with it. And she moved on. And I support her for that.
Peggy does not use her looks to her advantage. Yes, she's female, and most men just go ga ga over a woman (particularly, in Man Men). But she's more interested in what she thinks about your work. I loved the scene in the finale episode where she finds out that no one cares that she brought in a new client that is going to save the firm because everyone is more interested that Don is going to marry his secretary. Made me think: yes, I know what you mean. No one expects me to marry anyone at work, but the point is that no one is interested in the sad tale of the person who toils and toils away in obscurity.
I love Peggy. She's bold, ambitious, creative, and tries really, really hard to get what she wants. Which means that she tries too hard sometimes. Which can be her downfall.
(Oh, you're wondering who Peggy is? She's in Mad Men. Watch it.)
It sucks when the problem is that you try too hard. Because what are you supposed to do? Try a little less? Which goes against anything an ambitious person has been told (just give it your very best and forget the rest). How can you sit back and, say, watch things fall apart? Of course, you're going to try and try and try even if it means overwatering your plants so that the leaves turn brown, and roots start to rot, and it's all downhill for peace lily #2).
I like Peggy because she wants to succeed. She has a hunger and a drive. I used to think I had a hunger and a drive. I"m not so sure anymore. I like to think I have a hunger and a drive but that might not be the actuality. I'm mostly lazy.
Peggy goes with the flow. She got pregnant. Of her own volition? Not entirely clear. But she got pregnant. She dealt with it. And she moved on. And I support her for that.
Peggy does not use her looks to her advantage. Yes, she's female, and most men just go ga ga over a woman (particularly, in Man Men). But she's more interested in what she thinks about your work. I loved the scene in the finale episode where she finds out that no one cares that she brought in a new client that is going to save the firm because everyone is more interested that Don is going to marry his secretary. Made me think: yes, I know what you mean. No one expects me to marry anyone at work, but the point is that no one is interested in the sad tale of the person who toils and toils away in obscurity.
Monday, October 18, 2010
The Social Network
I watched The Social Network with my siblings last week. The movie was excellent. It dealt with the present phenomenon of Facebook, and it was interesting to see the web site's origins, albeit in a slightly fictionialized account. The story is built around the deposition transcripts of two lawsuits involving the primary Facebook founder, Mark Zuckerberg. The first lawsuit was brought by three individuals who alleged that he stole their idea when creating Facebook. The second lawsuit was brought by one of his co-founders who claims he was wrongly forced out of thee company. Both of those lawsuits have settled.
Not unsurprisingly, I was most interested in the lawsuits. The depositions of the principal characters showed how adversarial litigation can be. Truly, the process is not about truth-seeking. Rather, it is about entrenching one's position, highlighting the strengths of one's case, and trivializing the other side's position. I found myself wondering -- to what extent do lawyers actually affect the outcome of litigation, or is the success generally driven by the factual circumstances, something that a lawyer does not have control over when a client walks into his or her office. But then one of the junior associates in the film talked about how simple questions could persuasively skew a juror's perspective altogether, and I found myself wondering . . .
about how seeds are planted in our minds. You can neglect these seeds, and perhaps they die and rot away. But when a seed takes root, man, it grows and grows. (Quite unlike my plants, I should add. I attend to them so carefully. I prune them. I cut off the dying leaves. I give them adequate exposure to sunlight. I keep the water out overnight so that the chlorine settles. I put a few drops of plant food in the water. I talk to them. I nurture, I nurture, I give and I give and I give and right now the peace lily in my living room has decided that it simply hates me, and is withering away. By the way, this is peace lily #2. I sound like a crazy person right now.).
Where was I? Once an idea plants itself in your mind, it's really hard to let it go. To see things in a different light. How things could have been otherwise.
What does this have to do with the movie? Ah, such is the nature of my movie reviews.
Next post: The Mad Men Season Finale. If I ever have a daughter, I want her to be like Peggy.
Not unsurprisingly, I was most interested in the lawsuits. The depositions of the principal characters showed how adversarial litigation can be. Truly, the process is not about truth-seeking. Rather, it is about entrenching one's position, highlighting the strengths of one's case, and trivializing the other side's position. I found myself wondering -- to what extent do lawyers actually affect the outcome of litigation, or is the success generally driven by the factual circumstances, something that a lawyer does not have control over when a client walks into his or her office. But then one of the junior associates in the film talked about how simple questions could persuasively skew a juror's perspective altogether, and I found myself wondering . . .
about how seeds are planted in our minds. You can neglect these seeds, and perhaps they die and rot away. But when a seed takes root, man, it grows and grows. (Quite unlike my plants, I should add. I attend to them so carefully. I prune them. I cut off the dying leaves. I give them adequate exposure to sunlight. I keep the water out overnight so that the chlorine settles. I put a few drops of plant food in the water. I talk to them. I nurture, I nurture, I give and I give and I give and right now the peace lily in my living room has decided that it simply hates me, and is withering away. By the way, this is peace lily #2. I sound like a crazy person right now.).
Where was I? Once an idea plants itself in your mind, it's really hard to let it go. To see things in a different light. How things could have been otherwise.
What does this have to do with the movie? Ah, such is the nature of my movie reviews.
Next post: The Mad Men Season Finale. If I ever have a daughter, I want her to be like Peggy.
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Oh this here blog
I wish I could tell you that my real life was far more interesting than my blog life. Because I was just re-reading my last couple of blog posts and I thought, "Ick." As in boring, stop writing already, why don't you go out and do something for a change.
Last night I fell asleep on the couch at 645pm. Yes, it was a Saturday night.
In my defense, I had gone for a long run outdoors (something I never do, being more of a treadmill kind of guy, when I run that is, which isn't often). When I was almost home, I ran into Anjuna the Warrior Hero, and her room-mate, who said, oh come join us as we walk a mile or so. Which I did. Then I left them eating while I ran back home. So, as I lay on the couch, watching an SVU episode, I found myself dozing off . . .
I woke up at 9pm on Saturday night, and thought, oh my. I also realized I had fallen asleep in my sweaty, running clothes. So, I dragged myself off the couch, took a shower and contemplated dinner.
Which turned into a quick run to Gristedes before it closed. There I wandered around looking for (a) cup o' noodles, (b) Thai chili flavor chips, (c) ice-cream (I settle on Pistachio and then another tub of Hazel nut) and headed back home. Nothing screams sad and pathetic as shopping at 945pm in Gristedes for cup o' noodles, let me tell you.
It's fall. I have to pretend that the new season of TV shows is NOT my best friend and make a concerted effort to go outside and socialize with the real world. Stay tuned.
Last night I fell asleep on the couch at 645pm. Yes, it was a Saturday night.
In my defense, I had gone for a long run outdoors (something I never do, being more of a treadmill kind of guy, when I run that is, which isn't often). When I was almost home, I ran into Anjuna the Warrior Hero, and her room-mate, who said, oh come join us as we walk a mile or so. Which I did. Then I left them eating while I ran back home. So, as I lay on the couch, watching an SVU episode, I found myself dozing off . . .
I woke up at 9pm on Saturday night, and thought, oh my. I also realized I had fallen asleep in my sweaty, running clothes. So, I dragged myself off the couch, took a shower and contemplated dinner.
Which turned into a quick run to Gristedes before it closed. There I wandered around looking for (a) cup o' noodles, (b) Thai chili flavor chips, (c) ice-cream (I settle on Pistachio and then another tub of Hazel nut) and headed back home. Nothing screams sad and pathetic as shopping at 945pm in Gristedes for cup o' noodles, let me tell you.
It's fall. I have to pretend that the new season of TV shows is NOT my best friend and make a concerted effort to go outside and socialize with the real world. Stay tuned.
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